Don’t keep saying, “I don’t know where the time goes.” It goes the same place it’s always gone and no one has ever known where that is.
ANDY ROONEYUnfortunately, propaganda works.
More Andy Rooney Quotes
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A great many people do not have the right to their own opinion because they don’t know what they are talking about.
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Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don’t need to be done.
ANDY ROONEY -
Don’t take a butcher’s advice on how to cook meat. If he knew, he’d be a chef.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’m always on the lookout for something good about people. Often months go by.
ANDY ROONEY -
The average dog is a nicer person than the average person.
ANDY ROONEY -
I don’t like food that’s too carefully arranged; it makes me think that the chef is spending too much time arranging and not enough time cooking. If I wanted a picture I’d buy a painting.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned, That the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.
ANDY ROONEY -
Anyone who watches golf on television would enjoy watching the grass grow on the greens.
ANDY ROONEY -
Elephants and grandchildren never forget.
ANDY ROONEY -
I’ve learned. That when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you more.
ANDY ROONEY -
If you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.
ANDY ROONEY -
The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books – how not to eat what you’ve just learned how to cook.
ANDY ROONEY -
Most of us end up with no more than five or six people who remember us. Teachers have thousands of people who remember them for the rest of their lives.
ANDY ROONEY -
Go to bed. Whatever you’re staying up late for isn’t worth it.
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Sooner or later the world will have to return to the good old days when we fought wars and killed people the old-fashioned way, one at a time.
ANDY ROONEY