Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCEConsul – in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
-
-
An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Consul – in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
AMBROSE BIERCE -
Forgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
AMBROSE BIERCE