Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
AMBROSE BIERCEConsul – in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Democracy is defended in 3 stages. Ballot Box, Jury Box, Cartridge Box.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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Coward: One who, in a perilous emergency, thinks with his legs.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Alliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others.
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Mad, adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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