Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
AMBROSE BIERCESweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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REFLECTION,n: An Action of the mind whereby we obtain a clearer view of our relation to the things of yesterday and are able to avoid the perils that we shall not again encounter.
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In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Present, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
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Riot – A popular entertainment given to the military by innocent bystanders.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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