Conversation, n.: A vocal competition in which the one who is catching his breath is called the listener.
AMBROSE BIERCEVote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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The most affectionate creature in the world is a wet dog.
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In our civilization, and under our republican form of government, intelligence is so highly honored that it is rewarded by exemption from the cares of office.
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Patriotism. Combustible rubbish ready to the torch of any one ambitious to illuminate his name.
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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RUMOR, n. A favorite weapon of the assassins of character.
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In each human heart are a tiger, a pig, an ass and a nightingale. Diversity of character is due to their unequal activity.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Wine, madam, is God’s next best gift to man.
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Edible, adj.: Good to eat, and wholesome to digest, as a worm to a toad, a toad to a snake, a snake to a pig, a pig to a man, and a man to a worm.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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Ambition. An overmastering desire to be vilified by enemies while living and made ridiculous by friends when dead.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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