Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCEEulogy. Praise of a person who has either the advantages of wealth and power, or the consideration to be dead.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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MYTHOLOGY, n. The body of a primitive people’s beliefs concerning its origin, early history, heroes, deities and so forth, as distinguished from the true accounts which it invents later.
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Fear has no brains; it is an idiot.
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Optimist – A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.
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Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
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Dawn: When men of reason go to bed.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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ARMOR, n. The kind of clothing worn by a man whose tailor is a blacksmith.
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Opposition, n. In politics the party that prevents the government from running amuck by hamstringing it.
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Mayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
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