History is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
AMBROSE BIERCEHistory is an account, mostly false, of events, mostly unimportant, which are brought about by rulers, mostly knaves, and soldiers, mostly fools.
AMBROSE BIERCEThey say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
AMBROSE BIERCEAlliance – in international politics, the union of two thieves who have their hands so deeply inserted in each other’s pockets that they cannot separately plunder a third.
AMBROSE BIERCEIMAGINATION, n. A warehouse of facts, with poet and liar in joint ownership.
AMBROSE BIERCEA person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
AMBROSE BIERCEResponsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one’s neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.
AMBROSE BIERCEQuotation, n: The act of repeating erroneously the words of another.
AMBROSE BIERCEApril fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
AMBROSE BIERCEAll are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
AMBROSE BIERCEDivorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCEMayonnaise: One of the sauces which serve the French in place of a state religion.
AMBROSE BIERCEPerseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
AMBROSE BIERCEPresent, n. That part of eternity dividing the domain of disappointment from the realm of hope.
AMBROSE BIERCEThere is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don’t know.
AMBROSE BIERCEMIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
AMBROSE BIERCEA wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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