LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
AMBROSE BIERCEI think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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There are two instruments worse than a clarinet – two clarinets.
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Philosophy: A route of many roads leading from nowhere to nothing.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Belladonna, n.: In Italian a beautiful lady; in English a deadly poison. A striking example of the essential identity of the two tongues.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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An election is nothing more than the advanced auction of stolen goods.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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The covers of this book are too far apart.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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