Litigation: A machine which you go into as a pig and come out of as a sausage.
AMBROSE BIERCEI think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Labor is one of the processes by which A acquires property for B.
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PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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Eloquence, n. The art of orally persuading fools that white is the color that it appears to be. It includes the gift of making any color appear white.
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Don’t steal; thou’lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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Consul – in American politics, a person who having failed to secure an office from the people is given one by the Administration on condition that he leave the country.
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To the eye of failure success is an accident.
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Love: A temporary insanity curable by marriage.
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ULTIMATUM, n. In diplomacy, a last demand before resorting to concessions.
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Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman’s power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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Bore, n. A person who talks when you wish him to listen.
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The only distinction that democracies reward is a high degree of conformity.
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Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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