Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
AMBROSE BIERCEForgetfulness – a gift of God bestowed upon debtors in compensation for their destitution of conscience.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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Absurdity, n.: A statement or belief manifestly inconsistent with one’s own opinion.
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Perseverance – a lowly virtue whereby mediocrity achieves an inglorious success.
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He who thinks with difficulty believes with alacrity.
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You don’t have to be stupid to be a Christian, but it probably helps.
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All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
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Fidelity – a virtue peculiar to those who are about to be betrayed.
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They say that hens do cackle loudest when there is nothing vital in the eggs they have laid.
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Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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Ocean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
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Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.
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Accordion, n. An instrument in harmony with the sentiments of an assassin.
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Abstainer: a weak person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.
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Mausoleum, n: the final and funniest folly of the rich.
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Sweater, n.: garment worn by child when its mother is feeling chilly.
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