Banks have a new image. Now you have ‘a friend,’ your friendly banker. If the banks are so friendly, how come they chain down the pens?
ALAN KINGLet’s face it: It’s difficult enough to be funny without worrying about what is going to offend whom.
More Alan King Quotes
-
-
I was a high school throw-out.
ALAN KING -
My mother kept the house clean and we ate good.
ALAN KING -
One thing I’ve never said in my whole life is, ‘Let’s have dinner at a Japanese restaurant.’
ALAN KING -
There’s a charm, there’s a rhythm, there’s a soul to Jewish humor.
ALAN KING -
You want to attack somebody? Make fun of them.
ALAN KING -
Marriage is nature’s way of keeping us from fighting with strangers.
ALAN KING -
When I read Dickens for the first time, I thought he was Jewish, because he wrote about oppression and bigotry, all the things that my father talked about.
ALAN KING -
We set no styles, no standards. We’re reflections. It’s a distorted mirror in the fun house.
ALAN KING -
When I first saw Richard Pryor perform, I told him, ‘You’re doing a Jewish act.’
ALAN KING -
Eating takes a special talent. Some people are much better at it than others. In that way, it is like sex, and as with sex.
ALAN KING -
My mother’s sister was killed in a trolley car accident, so I was raised as one of eight with my sister and six male cousins.
ALAN KING -
An old socialist-unionist who always considered himself a failure. His big line was: ‘Don’t end up like me.
ALAN KING -
I didn’t know we were poor until I started giving interviews.
ALAN KING -
My son says I never tell stories about anyone who’s living.
ALAN KING -
Now that’s better than sex, but only if the salami is thickly sliced.
ALAN KING