The reason why you know more funny dudes than funny chicks is that dudes are funnier than chicks. If my daughter has a mediocre sense of humor
ADAM CAROLLAI’m like John Q. Public. I represent what every guy wants and needs.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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Maybe it’s weird, but I don’t feel in any way, shape or form that I’m taking over his show.
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You should feel good about yourself because of your accomplishments. Not because somebody yelled at you to feel good about yourself.
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I liked radio, or podcasting. I like talking minus the camera and the script part. All those mediums are different, and they are all different with their pluses and minuses.
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People have to be realistic, or the dream just drags on.
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Lets not focus on saving a nickel… lets focus on making a buck.
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Junior colleges are high schools with ashtrays.
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They advertise the bejeeezus out of yogurt, but I haven’t seen one pie commercial.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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If Joy Behar or Sherri Shepherd was a dude, they’d be off TV. They’re not funny enough for dudes. What if Roseanne Barr was a dude? Think we’d know who she was?
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If you’ve driven over to the gay section of Los Angeles, it’s like a golf course… Real estate values go ‘boom!’
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I’m just gonna tell her, “Be a staff writer for a sitcom. Because they’ll have to hire you, they can’t really fire you, and you don’t have to produce that much. It’ll be awesome.”
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Oprah tells women what to read, what to eat, what to think, what to do.
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I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don’t know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.
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That’s an interesting philosophical question. When your boner goes away, is that one gone… forever?
ADAM CAROLLA