black
grey
blue
red
brown
white

To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.

Adam Carolla

I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I’m not interested in hurting their feelings.
ADAM CAROLLA

Enough Good Hurt Hurting Interesting Nice Parent People
The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It’s a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
ADAM CAROLLA

Art Beautiful Car
It’s like the Fouth of July in my underpants.
ADAM CAROLLA

Fouth July Like Underpants
Here’s what you know: you know when you’re getting laid, and you know when it’s all over. Those are the only two things you’re aware of.
ADAM CAROLLA

Aware Get Getting Laid Over Thing
Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
ADAM CAROLLA

Crocs Down Gay Look Realize Wearing
The truth is we’re all probably more creative than we realize, except we spend our lives watching TV or reading somebody else’s book.
ADAM CAROLLA

Book Creative Reading Teliviosn Truth Watching
California is like the hot blond high school chick who’s been getting by on her looks, but now she’s 45 and falling apart.
ADAM CAROLLA

Country Fall Forty-Five Look School
Oprah tells women what to read, what to eat, what to think, what to do.
ADAM CAROLLA

Oprah Read Reading Tell Thinking Women
I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
ADAM CAROLLA

Fake Funny Humor None Orgasm Two Type Women
I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they’re making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.
ADAM CAROLLA

Bigger Commercial Funny Humor Maxi Nice Pad Visual
If in 1989 I said, ‘I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,’ they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
ADAM CAROLLA

Beer Bottle Butterfly Chased Idea Sell Water
When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it’s about fudge packing and triple D’s at 13.
ADAM CAROLLA

Asian Colege Fudge Funny Growing Up Humor People Thirteen
So most people don’t have the courage to admit there’s no God and they know it. They feel it. They try to suppress it. And if you bring it up they get angry because it freaks them out.
ADAM CAROLLA

Admit Bringing Courage God Keep People Suppress
I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.
ADAM CAROLLA

Angry Comically Complaining Laughing People Start
The pace of radio is very fast. Boom, boom, with a little six minute segment, then on to the next thing. With podcasts you can talk about something for 25 minutes if you like – there is a lot of artistic freedom with it.
ADAM CAROLLA

Boom Fast Next Podcast Radio Segment Thing Very
Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
ADAM CAROLLA

Head Hungarian Paprikash Reader Some Toss World

To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

To make something, you have to work within your abilities. Honestly assess what you can do and even more important, what can’t you do.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

More Adam Carolla Quotes