When I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
GEORGE BURNSWhen I was a boy the Dead Sea was only sick.
GEORGE BURNSI honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
GEORGE BURNSI’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
GEORGE BURNSFirst you forget names, then you forget faces. Next you forget to pull your zipper up and finally, you forget to pull it down.
GEORGE BURNSEverything that goes up must come down. But there comes a time when not everything that’s down can come up.
GEORGE BURNSI’m at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
GEORGE BURNSI look to the future because that’s where I’m going to spend the rest of my life.
GEORGE BURNSI spent a year in that town, one Sunday.
GEORGE BURNSI’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere.
GEORGE BURNSI don’t believe in dying. It’s been done. I’m working on a new exit. Besides, I can’t die now – I’m booked.
GEORGE BURNSYou’ve got to be honest; if you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
GEORGE BURNSI would go out with women my age, but there are no women my age.
GEORGE BURNSDon’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed.
GEORGE BURNSI can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
GEORGE BURNSYou know you’re getting old when you stoop to tie your shoelaces and wonder what else you could do while you’re down there.
GEORGE BURNSHappiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.
GEORGE BURNS