Acting deals with very delicate emotions. It is not putting up a mask.
RODNEY DANGERFIELDI haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
More Rodney Dangerfield Quotes
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My father carries around the picture of the kid who came with his wallet.
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When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.
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My wife can’t cook at all. She made chocolate mousse. An antler got stuck in my throat.
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My wife met me at the door the other night in a sexy negligee. Unfortunately, she was just coming home.
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I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her.
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Life is just a bowl of pits.
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I worked in a pet store and people would ask how big I would get.
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A girl phoned me the other day and said… ‘Come on over, there’s nobody home.’ I went over. Nobody was home.
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We sleep in separate rooms, we have dinner apart, we take separate vacations – we’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together.
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My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I want a second opinion. He said okay, you’re ugly too.
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My mother had morning sickness after I was born.
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I was so ugly my mother used to feed me with a sling shot.
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At twenty a man is full of fight and hope. He wants to reform the world. When he is seventy he still wants to reform the world, but he knows he can’t.
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I saved a girl from being attacked last night. I controlled myself.
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Some dog I got too. We call him Egypt. Because in every room he leaves a pyramid.
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