“Every ethnic group has this where people within it will try and tell each other how they should be.”

So what I would say to other people is to just embrace who you are because you will become instantly happier.

All these young books for women are like I’m 29 with a closet full of Prada shoes and I can’t get a date. Come on.

I have always been a softie, and I fight it with every fiber of my being. Sadly, my being’s fibers need to hit the gym.

It is hard, it lasts all day, the lighting is generally fluorescent, and, apparently, drinking at your desk is frowned upon.

I love to be busy and be challenged. I’m my happiest when I’m under pressure and almost overwhelmed by how much I have to get done.

I don’t know if I was always an open person, but I think stand-up comics specifically have this way of running towards embarrassing things.

Real sacrifice. Real disappointment. Real failure. And it requires the ability to scrape your sorry ass up off the floor, stumble to your feet.

If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.

I can tell you this: Stand-up is not glamorous.

A belief in feminism is a belief in personal freedom.

Real success and accomplishment, at whatever it is you are passionate about, requires real work.

I love being married. I love my husband. I think married people always have that thing where they think that the grass is greener on the single side, but all my single friends are like,

Wounds turn into scars and scars make you tough.

I’m such a geek, and have always been a real nerd.

I visualize myself winning the Olympic Pentathlon, inventing a phone that can be controlled by brain waves, or doing the laundry.

“You are going to fail, and anyone who is success has powered through many, many failures.”

Real friends were the kind where you pick up where you’d left off, whether it be a week since you’d seen each other or two years.

For the warrior, every moment is a challenge to be genuine, and each challenge is delightful. When you let go properly, you can relax and enjoy the challenge.

I have great hopes that we shall love each other all our lives as much as if we had never married at all.

It was like they waited to tell each other things that had never been told before. What she had to say was terrible and afraid. But what he would tell her was so true that it would make everything all right.

The problem to be solved, the mystery to be clarified. It is never a matter of civil war; even though of different opinions, or of different political leanings, scientists dispute each other, they compete.

A lot of my colleagues actually yell and curse at each other. I don’t do that.

We are not people who touch each other carelessly; every point of contact between us feels important, a rush of energy and relief.

I know exactly how we fit together, his arm around my waist, my hands on his chest, the pressure of his lips on mine. We have each other memorized.