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I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.

Aisha Tyler

I grew up on the back of a motorcycle – my dad didn’t have a car until I was a teenager. And then my closest friend from grade school was a guy.
AISHA TYLER

Back Car Dad Grade Motorcycle School Teenager
So I think the longer you do stand-up, the more comfortable you are. You stop wanting to hide your foibles and instead want to show who you are.
AISHA TYLER

Comfortable Foibe Hide Instead Longer Show Stand Think Up Wanting
I will say that stand-up is my first love; it’s how I got started and is in my bones.
AISHA TYLER

Bone First How Love Say Stand Started Up
I started out being a stand up and writing my own material. That took me to Talk Soup, where I was writing and performing for TV.
AISHA TYLER

Dad Eye Give Up Material Started Writing
I’m my own boss and my boss is a total ass.
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Ass Boss My Own Total
I’m just going to be the best version of me that I could possibly be and be as funny as I possibly can.
AISHA TYLER

Being Best Find Funny Going People Possibly Version
The best advice anybody could have given me was to keep getting up over and over again.
AISHA TYLER

Advice Again Anybody Best Get Given Over
I want to point out, that this is not my fault that everyone’s afraid of me, because I did not kill a couple people the other day.
AISHA TYLER

Afraid Couple Day Everyone Fault Kill Other People Point Want
I love it when I come across a word I don’t know. And I would never treat my audience like they weren’t smart enough to come along with me.
AISHA TYLER

Across Audience Come Enough Know Smart Treat Word
I don’t want to be pandered to, so I try not to pander.
AISHA TYLER

Pander So Try Want
I’m the kindest, most supportive friend ever, probably to my own detriment, but I hope that I am toughening up a little bit.
AISHA TYLER

Friend Hope Kindest Little Own Probably Supportive
Much like a wobbly toddler or an unhinged politician, one immediately looks for someone else to blame. God. Your parents. Ex-girlfriends. Undocumented immigrants. Marvin in Human Resources. China.
AISHA TYLER

Blame Else God Human Immediate Look Much Parent Politician Resource Someone Toddler
After going through a lot of procedures and spending a lot of money … the doctor said, ‘Look, based on what we’re seeing here, I just don’t think this is going to happen for you.’
AISHA TYLER

Based Doctors Going Happen Look Procedure Spending Thinking
I can tell you this: Stand-up is not glamorous.
AISHA TYLER

Glamorous Stand Tell Up
On general principle, I boycott shows that don’t employ actors.
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Actor Boycott Employ General Principle Show
When I was young I thought, ‘Yeah, people don’t see, they’re not recognizing how funny I am, and how talented I am’. And the guys that mentored me were like, ‘
AISHA TYLER

Funny Guy Look People Recognize Talented Thought
So much of a stand-up’s life is doing live radio and having to be funny and quick on the spot with these strangers, and sort of surgical in terms of how funny I can be in three minutes.
AISHA TYLER

Doing Funny Life Live Minute Much Quick Radio Sou Spot Stand Stranger Surgical Three
So what I would say to other people is to just embrace who you are because you will become instantly happier.
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Embrace Happier Instant Other People Say
So everything is all the same job in my eyes, and I don’t want to ever give up any part of it.
AISHA TYLER

Ever Everything Give Job Part Same Want
When I get old and slow down I want to look behind me and see all the fire and the wreckage and no stone left unturned.
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Behind Fire Look Old Slow Sown Stone Want
I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.
AISHA TYLER

Black Crack Doe Droop
Am I going to complain about being typecast as smart? I don’t think so.
AISHA TYLER

Complain Going Smart Think Typecast
Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.
AISHA TYLER

Be Each Just Kind Marriage Mystery Other Selfish
All these young books for women are like I’m 29 with a closet full of Prada shoes and I can’t get a date. Come on.
AISHA TYLER

All Book Closet Come Date Like Prada Shoe Women Young
Successful people just don’t let failure define them or keep them from doing what they want to do. For example, I’d have people come up to me after my shows, and they’d say they want to do stand-up but are scared they’re going to fail. I’d tell them,
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Define Doing Example Failure Keep People Scare Show Fall Successful Want
Pop culture hales you and wants you to fail.
AISHA TYLER

Culture Failing Fall Pop Want
If you ever needed to ruin someone’s fun, I mean really poop a party, just move things to the workplace. Fun terminated.
AISHA TYLER

Move Need Poop Ruin Someone Terminate Thing Workplace

I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.

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I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.

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Popular Authors

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