“I have always been a softie, and I fight it with every fiber of my being. Sadly, my being’s fibers need to hit the gym.”

I will say that stand-up is my first love; it’s how I got started and is in my bones.

Pop culture is great, but it can be bad, at times.

I like to be nice. I want to be a hero. I want to save people. Or just kill zombies, because they deserve it, because they’re already dead and they can’t feel it. They don’t have feelings.

I always wanted to be as busy as possible so that if one job went away I’d still have plenty of other things to do.

Comedy is ugly. It’s honest, it’s raw.

I do not actually DO these things, but I see myself doing them, and that is almost MORE satisfying, because I am also lying down.

Karaoke is the great equalizer.

When one is undone—sprawled across the cold tile of a public bathroom in a pool of one’s own vomit, or shivering in the back of a taxi in a pair of urine-soaked skinny jeans with no money for cab fare and a dead cell phone battery.

Whereas regular people tend to run away – because the embarrassing story is always going to be the really funny story.

I’ve always been a gamer, and I had a period where I was gaming at a really hardcore level.

Marriage is a mystery and part of it is just being kind to each other, not being selfish.

I think I was only attracted to drunken douches before I got married.

I wish I could say I’m an architect and planned it this way, foresaw doing all these things, but honestly, I’ve been lucky that things have come across my path and they’ve worked out well for me.

I’m black, and black don’t crack. It does droop.

I want everyone, regardless of gender, to live a life free of restriction or fear, able to pursue their own personal brand of happiness and fulfillment.

When I was younger, those kinds of comments bothered me, but eventually got to a point where I realized I wasn’t going to change who I was.

I don’t care who scores the goals, I’m going to leave my human beingness on the field!

It’s so silly not to be nice.

I’ve grown so much, not just as an actor, but as a human being.

I don’t like to be me. I’m not so comfortable being me on screen because then I’d be a presenter. I’m not Jimmy Fallon.

I mean, I’ve never really had much security, to be honest.

The challenge to be the best is what drives me and to just improve my body every day.

Why should you mind being wrong if someone can show you that you are?

Expelled from the truth of Being, man everywhere circles around himself as the animal rationale.