The shuttle is the worst $20 you’ll ever save. It adds 90 minutes to whatever a Town Car or cab would have been.
ADAM CAROLLAScrew guilt — I could have sex with 10 men and it wouldn’t bother me. I’m an atheist!
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I would say the podcast is my favorite because I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format.
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I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.
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My motto is “more mystery, less history”.
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Toss some Hungarian in every once in a while. You will not be sorry. Good, solid peasant food.
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The thing is if you have 10 views that land you on the left side of the aisle and two views that land you on the right side of the aisle, then people just put you on the right side of the aisle. I’m not sure why.
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Wearing Crocs is like getting blown by a dude. It feels great until you look down and realize you’re gay.
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. It’s an even wooden floor, and may the best man or woman win. And I say God bless Dancing with the Stars, and God bless the USA.
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I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much.
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No, I had not read any other comedian’s book. Not that I don’t enjoy other comedians; I’m just not a reader.
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I’m a comedian, not a politician.
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I don’t like soccer. I think it makes you soft. And by the way, you telling me it’s the biggest whatever in the World, look, they drink tea everywhere too; they’re pussies, you understand? I want some coffee.
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I don’t know anything about computers.
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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I have feelings that are to the right, and I have feelings that land on the left side of the aisle.
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The very definition of ‘beauty’ is outside.
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The believe-in-yourself adage is grossly overrated.
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When I am king, I will revise the sexual bases system so that getting to first base will include oral sex and sodomy!
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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I know everything because I know nothing.
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Then there’s the in-between, not a lipstick lesbian, not a butch dyke. I think that is what I’d be, a sweatpants lesbian.
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I think people have a strong desire to push me and others into some sort of political box that they can wrap their minds around.
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You shouldn’t be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.
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I have a daughter who I love very much, I hire women, I’ve worked with women, I’ve never had an issue with women.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
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I got drunk in Canada. I was there for 2 days but I was drunk there for 4 days. I don’t know how it worked. I guess it was with the time difference or something.
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I get depressed at airports.
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