I’m a sort of nuts-and-bolts guy. I’m into turning wrenches and swinging a hammer and wrenching on cars.
ADAM CAROLLAChicks named Tammy have a greater chance of actually driving a Mercedes than a chick named Mercedes.
More Adam Carolla Quotes
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I’d never hurt another person.
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I am not a good cue card reader.
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And the mirror ball doesn’t care what color you are, and it doesn’t care how rich your parents are, and it doesn’t care what God you pray to
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I’m really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life. So, something that is potentially four months down the road is not just a mile down the road for me, it’s a million miles down the road.
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I have no connection with Hollywood. I’m not interested. I don’t care.
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A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money.
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I like radio and live performing stuff. I don’t like the television stuff as much. Some people do. It takes a certain breed of cat. .
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You don’t realize how much you use your credit card not even to buy things. It’s a card you get so you can navigate society.
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People look at me, and they go, ‘You’re white, you’re smart, you must have went to college. You must have grown up with money.’
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I am semi-ambivalent about being on camera – sort of low-key. I don’t like being on camera stuff that much.
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I’m not comically oriented. I get angry and I start complaining and then people start laughing. I don’t even want them to laugh half the time.
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If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you’ll have a good life.
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When I’m in power, here’s how I’m gonna put the country back on its feet. I’m going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the ‘tardiest of the ‘tards like the thick crust.
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There are certain things women are better at than men.
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If you’re conservative in Hollywood, you’re on a list of people who need to be put in their place.
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