As you go down the path of life, ask whats true. Not who else believes it.
BILL MAHERNow people want Brian Williams to resign, but it could have a happy ending. Apparently what he said was such a blatant departure from the truth, today he got an offer from Fox News.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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If anti-gay stuff is always coming out of your mouth, something very gay is probably going in.
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I think flying planes into a building was a faith-based initiative. I think religion is a neurological disorder.
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Here’s the thing about Donald Trump: He never apologizes. He’s never wrong, no matter what crazy thing he says. He’s totally – he’s the white Kanye.
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Don’t get so tolerant that you tolerate intolerance.
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Emergency rooms will be used the way they were intended to be used: not for primary care, but for when the average freaky American get some strange object up his ass.
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Things aren’t right. If a burglar breaks into your home and you shoot him, he can sue you. For what, restraint of trade?
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Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
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Idiots must stop claiming that atheism is a religion. Religion is defined as the belief in and worship of a superhuman controlling power. And atheism is… precisely not that. Atheism is a religion like abstinence is a sex position.
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Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
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To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click ‘I Agree’.
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Our mistakes from the past are just that: mistakes. And they were necessary to make in order to become the wiser person we became.
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Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me – I quit.’
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Faith means the purposeful suspension of critical thinking. It’s nothing to be admired.
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We had a national tragedy this week, and the President of the United States and Sarah Palin both made speeches on the same day. Obama came out against lunatics with guns, she gave the rebuttal.
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Just honest. To me, being ‘politically incorrect’ means the opposite of being political — which means to spin everything. That’s all it’s ever meant to me. It’s never meant liberal or conservative. It means honest.
BILL MAHER