To a coward, courage always looks like stupidity.
BILL MAHERReligion, to me, is a bureaucracy between man and God that I don’t need.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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It’s not getting any better for the American people. It seems to be getting worse. That’s predictable; education is a cycle. Stupidity breeds more stupidity.
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Men are only as loyal as their options.
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The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you’ll wind up with a lover.
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I don’t say that I’m an atheist. I don’t like that term, because I think it mirrors the certitude of religion. I say I don’t know. And if you don’t know – and you don’t – just man up and say you don’t know. Don’t turn to silly stories and ancient myths.
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The “Power of One” is a slogan–not a goal.
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I always compare marriage to communism. They’re both institutions that don’t conform to human nature, so you’re going to end up with lying and hypocrisy.
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America is like a dog. I’m sorry, but it is. It cannot understand actual words. It understands inflection. It understands fear. But you can’t actually explain issues to a dog.
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We don’t really have to make fun of religion – it makes fun of itself.
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Atheism is a religion the way abstinence is a sex position.
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You know, there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time, husband!!!
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If you believe Jesus ever had a good word for war or torture or tax cuts for the rich, or raping the earth, or refusing water to dying migrants, then you might as well believe bunnies lay painted eggs.
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If Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?
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Like it or not, we’re still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation.
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I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.
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I feel like I’m wearing orthopedic shoes, because I stand corrected.
BILL MAHER