RATIONAL, adj. Devoid of all delusions save those of observation, experience and reflection.
AMBROSE BIERCEOcean: A body of water occupying about two-thirds of a world made for man – who has no gills.
More Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Death is not the end. There remains the litigation over the estate.
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Scriptures – The sacred books of our holy religion, as distinguished from the false and profane writings on which all other faiths are based.
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Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.
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PAIN, n. An uncomfortable frame of mind that may have a physical basis in something that is being done to the body, or may be purely mental, caused by the good fortune of another.
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LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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Distance, n. The only thing that the rich are willing for the poor to call theirs and keep.
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April fool, n. The March fool with another month added to his folly.
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Saint: A dead sinner revised and edited.
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Knowledge is the small part of ignorance that we arrange and classify.
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Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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War is God’s way of teaching Americans geography.
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Politics: A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.
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Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else
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MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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Prescription: A physician’s guess at what will best prolong the situation with least harm to the patient.
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