Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it’s the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.
NORM MACDONALDThe beginning of wisdom is the knowledge of folly.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
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It is vain to complain of fortune while we fail in policy and conduct.
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The most frequent cause of regret for what we have done is because its effects interfere with what we would do.
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Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
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I think clever people think that poor people are stupid.
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I don’t know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it’s fun to watch either one of them get beat up.
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There are two indiscretions that generally distinguish fools: a readiness to report whatever they hear, and a practice of communicating with secrecy what is commonly understood.
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All my life’s about is cracking up people and them cracking me up and trying not to think about dying. That doesn’t cost very much money.
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Ignorance is better than knowledge misapplied.
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Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.
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With the ambitious, the failure of one expedient is the suggestion of another; but with the irresolute, defeat usually occasions abandonment of purpose.
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I don’t care for sex. I find it an embarrassing, dull exercise. I prefer sports, where you can win.
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The joy a person is usually seen to express at the conversion of another to his opinion is seldom more than the impulse of egotistical satisfaction at being considered worthy of didactic imitation.
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
NORM MACDONALD






