I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
STEVE MARTINSome nights, alone, he thinks of her, and some nights, alone, she thinks of him. Some night these thoughts, separated by miles and time zones, occur at the same objective moment, and Ray and Mirabelle are connected without ever knowing it.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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Now let’s repeat the non-conformists’ oath: I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people say! Good!
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There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
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Chaos in the midst of chaos isn’t funny, but chaos in the midst of order is.
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Dinosaurs did not walk with humans. The evolutionary record says different. They gambled.
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Don’t have sex man. It leads to kissing and pretty soon you have to start talking to them.
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When I die, now don’t think that I’m a nut, don’t want no fancy funeral, just one like old King Tut.
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I believe that sex is one of the most beautiful, natural, wholesome things that money can buy.
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First the doctor told me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me.
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How many people have never raised their hand before?
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Acting is collaborative because you are working with another actor, and it’s almost like a two-man juggling team. You have to really be in sync.
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It’s pain that changes our lives.
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I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.
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Be so good they can’t ignore you.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
STEVE MARTIN