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Never give a sucker an even break.

W. C. Fields

Drat! Being the encapsulated view of life.
W. C. FIELDS

Life View
If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.
W. C. FIELDS

Need Quit Stupidity Time
This job will drive me to drink, and for that reason, I will be eternally grateful.
W. C. FIELDS

Drive Grateful Myself Reason
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Hands Myself See
Philadelphia, wonderful town, spent a week there one night.
W. C. FIELDS

Night Time Wonderful
I’m looking for loopholes. (Said when caught reading the Bible.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religious
I never eat before breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Eat Myself One Liner
I have spent a lot of time searching through the Bible for loopholes.
W. C. FIELDS

Myself Religion Time
Anyone who hates children and animals can’t be all bad.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Bad Children Hate
I never met a kid I liked.
W. C. FIELDS

Children Myself One Liner
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Home
You can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Belief Trust Yourself
I spent half my money on gambling, alcohol and wild women. The other half I wasted.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Money Myself Wild Woman
The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.
W. C. FIELDS

Alive Danger Man Place World
Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.
W. C. FIELDS

Happiness Instagram Captions Money Place
I drink with impunity, or anyone else who invites me.
W. C. FIELDS

Company Myself

Never give a sucker an even break.

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Never give a sucker an even break.

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