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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

W. C. Fields

If it does not work the first time, try, try again. Then quit. No need to be an idiot.
W. C. FIELDS

Need Quit Stupidity Time
A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Money Poor Rich
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again. Then quit. There’s no point in being a damn fool about it.
W. C. FIELDS

Fools Inspirational Quit Success Yourself
Try till you succeed, if you don’t succeed once, then destroy all evidence of the fact that you tried!
W. C. FIELDS

Destroy Evidence Success Yourself
I don’t have to attend every argument I’m invited to.
W. C. FIELDS

Argument Attitude Myself
I always keep a supply of stimulant handy in case I see a snake, which I also keep handy.
W. C. FIELDS

Animal Hands Myself See
Comedy is merely tragedy happening to someone else.
W. C. FIELDS

Deep Reality Tragedy
When doctors and undertakers meet, they wink at each other.
W. C. FIELDS

Doctor Togetherness
You can fool some of the people some of the time and that’s enough to make a decent living.
W. C. FIELDS

Enough Fools Live People Time Yourself
You can’t trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.
W. C. FIELDS

Belief Trust Yourself
Was I in here last night and did I spend a $20 bill? Oh, thank goodness… I thought I’d lost it.
W. C. FIELDS

Goodness Lost Myself Night Thankful
I must have a drink of breakfast.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Morning Myself
You can’t cheat an honest man.
W. C. FIELDS

Honesty Man Yourself
Everybody’s got to believe in something. I believe I’ll have another beer.
W. C. FIELDS

Alcohol Believe
A man without a woman is like a neck without a pain.
W. C. FIELDS

Man Pain Woman
Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There’s nothing like having a midget for a butler.
W. C. FIELDS

Food Home

The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

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The laziest man I ever met put popcorn in his pancakes so they would turn over by themselves.

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