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In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.

Tina Fey

A Clinical Study. Taking some time to read each night really taught me how to feign narcolepsy when my husband asked me what my “plan” was for taking down the Christmas tree.
TINA FEY

Ask Christmas Clinical Each Feign Husband Read Some Study Talk Taught Tree
The arms of Michelle Obama, and doll tits. The person closest to actually achieving this look is Kim Kardashian, who, as we know, was made by Russian scientists to sabotage our athletes.
TINA FEY

Achieve Arm Athlete Closet Country Doll Made People Person President Scientist
I don’t like a tremendous amount of conflict. I don’t think that fighting and passion are the same thing.
TINA FEY

Amount Conflict Fight Fighting Like Passion Same Thing Think Thinking Tremendous
In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.
TINA FEY

Bomb Dog Feel Late Order Purchase Safer Sniff Too
In most cases being a good boss means hiring talented people and then getting out of their way.
TINA FEY

Boss Case Good Mean People Talent Top Management Way Witty
I want every day to be the most boring news day ever. I want every day to be about spelling bee champions and baby basketball. It’s better to have no comedy material than a horrific news day.
TINA FEY

Baby Basketball Boring Champion Every Most News Spell
North Korea referred to The Interview as absolutely intolerable and a wanton act of terror.
TINA FEY

Absolute Act Country Interview Intolerable Refer Terror Wanton
Why are my arms so weak? It’s like I did that push-up last year for nothing!
TINA FEY

Arm Change Educate Energy Nothing Rock Year
Everybody kind of gets to be the person they didn’t get to be.
TINA FEY

Everybody Get Kind Person Prison
In Washington, officials from the National Rifle Association met with a group of high school students. There were no survivors.
TINA FEY

Asociation Country Funny High Humor Met National Official Rifle School Student
You can’t control things by being nervous.
TINA FEY

Being Control Nervous Thing
I was a little excited but mostly blorft. “Blorft” is an adjective I just made up that means ‘Completely overwhelmed but proceeding as if everything is fine and reacting to the stress with the torpor of a possum.’ I have been blorft every day for the past seven years.
TINA FEY

Adjective Blorfit Excite Little Mean Mostly Stress Witty
It’s the same reason I don’t get Hooters. Why do we need to enjoy chicken wings and boobies at the same time? Yes, they are a natural and beautiful part of the human experience. And so are boobies. But why at the same time?
TINA FEY

Beautiful Boodies Chicken Enjoy Hooter Need Reason Same Time Wing Wings
Do your thing and don’t care if they like it.
TINA FEY

Badass Being Care Like Thing Witty Yourself
If you want to be a screenwriter, take an acting class to get a sense of what you’re asking actors to do. Learning other skills will help you communicate with people and respect what they do.
TINA FEY

Act Actor Ask Class People Screenwriter Sense Skill Want
‘How do you juggle it all?’ people constantly ask me, with an accusatory look in their eyes. ‘You’re screwing it all up, aren’t you?’ their eyes say.
TINA FEY

Accusatory All Ask Constant Dream Eye Job Juggle Look Mother People

In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.

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In order to feel safer on his private jet, actor John Travolta has purchased a bomb-sniffing dog. Unfortunately for the actor, the dog came six movies too late.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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