Now let’s repeat the non-conformists’ oath: I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people say! Good!
STEVE MARTINIt’s not the size of the nose that matters, it’s what’s inside that counts.
More Steve Martin Quotes
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I love money. I love everything about it.
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I will do anything to look like him – except, of course, exercise or eat right.
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Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
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Thankfully, perseverance is a good substitute for talent.
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I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them.
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It’s not the size of the nose that matters, it’s what’s inside that counts.
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I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
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No art comes from the conscious mind.
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You know that look that women get when they want to have sex? Me neither.
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I guess I wouldn’t believe in anything if it weren’t for my lucky astrology mood watch.
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I was deeply unhappy, but I didn’t know it because I was so happy all the time.
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With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it’s going to work. And then you get the response. It’s great when it’s good.
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I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
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I started a grease fire at McDonald’s – threw a match in the cook’s hair.
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I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
STEVE MARTIN