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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.

Steve Martin

I just downloaded eleven hundred books onto my Kindle, and now I can’t lift it.
STEVE MARTIN

Book Funny Myself
Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you’ll be a mile away and have his shoes.
STEVE MARTIN

Criticize Himself Man Walk Way Yourself
With comedy, you never know until you put it in front of an audience. You shoot it and a year later you have no idea if it’s going to work. And then you get the response. It’s great when it’s good.
STEVE MARTIN

Audience Comedy Goodness Greatness Ideas Response Work Yourself
Acting has helped me understand people, not only because you are acting as a character, but also because you are watching other actors work. That really helps you identify in life when someone is acting, not being true.
STEVE MARTIN

Act Character Help Identify Life People True Understand Yourself
I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.
STEVE MARTIN

Day Life Myself Past Present
No art comes from the conscious mind.
STEVE MARTIN

Art Conscience Mindset One Liner
It’s pain that changes our lives.
STEVE MARTIN

Change Live One Liner Ourselves Pain
Always make room for the unexpected in yourself.
STEVE MARTIN

Expectation Inspirational Motivational Room Yourself
I’m not trying to be a big shot or anything like that, but I get my drinks half price.
STEVE MARTIN

Drink Myself Price Try
There’s someone out there for everyone – even if you need a pickaxe, a compass, and night goggles to find them.
STEVE MARTIN

Need People Relationship Soul Mate Yourself
It was essential that I never show doubt about what I was doing.
STEVE MARTIN

Appearance Confidence Doubt Motivational Myself
I actually learned about sex watching neighborhood dogs. And it was good. Go ahead and laugh. I think the most important thing I learned was: Never let go of the girl’s leg, no matter how hard she tries to shake you off.
STEVE MARTIN

Animal Funny Goodness Important Laughter Learning Myself Sex
The banjo is such a happy instrument–you can’t play a sad song on the banjo – it always comes out so cheerful.
STEVE MARTIN

Cheerful Happiness Play Sad Yourself
There is one thing I would break up over, and that is if she caught me with another woman. I won’t stand for that.
STEVE MARTIN

Break Up Cheating Herself Myself Woman
Despite a lack of natural ability, I did have the one element necessary to all early creativity: naïveté, that fabulous quality that keeps you from knowing just how unsuited you are for what you are about to do.
STEVE MARTIN

Ability Element Natural Necessary Quality Yourself
Now let’s repeat the non-conformists’ oath: I promise to be different! I promise to be unique! I promise not to repeat things other people say! Good!
STEVE MARTIN

Different Goodness Myself People Promise Talk Unique

I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.

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I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language… Apache.

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