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Ultimately I’m the writer for me, but also, anytime one of my friends gets stuck with a bit, they can call me, and I’m pretty good at helping them get there.

Ron White

If you watch the ‘Blue Collar Comedy Tour,’ don’t expect that when you come see me by myself, ’cause it’s a little rougher.
RON WHITE

Blue Collar Come Comedy Little Rougher See Tour Watch
I don’t think we have a surplus of fine educators in this country that we can just start dropping them for no reason whatsoever.
RON WHITE

Country Start Drop Education Reason Surplus Think
The next time you have a thought… let it go.
RON WHITE

Let Go Next Thought Time
There were years when I was a beer and tequila guy, then I got real fat. And then I found that you could actually go on a diet and drink scotch. Then I got hooked on scotch, and if you get hooked on scotch, then everything else just tastes wrong.
RON WHITE

Actual Beer Diet Drink Fat Guy Real Scotch Tequila Year
I don’t have a specific plan except for as long as people want to listen to me talk, I’m going to keep talking. I can’t imagine a life without doing standup.
RON WHITE

Except Imagine Kep Life Listen Long People Plan Specific Talk
I go to more open mic nights than open mikers.
RON WHITE

Mic Milker More Night Open
I was a comedy fan when I was a little kid.
RON WHITE

Comedy Kid Little
I was considered by my peers to be a good comedian. So that’s all I ever strived to do was get some recognition from my peers.
RON WHITE

Been Comedian Consider Fun Good Peer Sure
If you look at the common denominator of all the comics who have had big success, it’s being true to their nature… that’s what takes a long time to learn.
RON WHITE

Big Comic Common Denominator Long Look Nature Success True
Anything I write that I consider stage-quality work, I won’t give my TV show. I put it in my live show.
RON WHITE

Anything Consider Live Quality Show Stage Television Work
People are saying that I’m an alcoholic, and that’s not true, because I only drink when I work, and I’m a workaholic.
RON WHITE

Alcoholic Drink People Say Work Workaholic
My brain is like a cross between a colander and a Lazy Susan – thin, slow, and it leaks.
RON WHITE

Between Brain Colander Cross Leak Slow
The way my brain processes information is quite odd. I mean, I have Attention Deficit Disorder and another learning disability I can’t even spell. I don’t even have a high school diploma. I’m smart, but you can’t prove it on paper.
RON WHITE

Another Attention Brain Deficit Disability Disorder Information Learn Mean Odd Proces Quite Way
But I work harder now because I have so much more exposure. And actually the harder you work as a writer, the better you get at it. It’s like anything else. It’s a muscle you have to exercise. I write more now than ever.
RON WHITE

Exercise Exposure Harder Like More Much Muscle Work Writer
There have been times when I played more than others, but I’ve been a road comic for a quarter of a century, so I’ve always played golf on the road because you have a lot of time to kill.
RON WHITE

Always Been Century Comic More Other Play Quater Time
I’m not the judge of who that is, but I am a believer that no debt in the universe goes unpaid. If you try to buy early, you’ll pay late.
RON WHITE

Believe Debt Judge Late Universe Unpaidm Buy

Ultimately I’m the writer for me, but also, anytime one of my friends gets stuck with a bit, they can call me, and I’m pretty good at helping them get there.

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Ultimately I’m the writer for me, but also, anytime one of my friends gets stuck with a bit, they can call me, and I’m pretty good at helping them get there.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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