Humor Quotes

A church is a place in which gentlemen who have never been to Heaven brag about it to persons who will never get there.

When I was a boy, I laid in my twin-sized bed and wondered where my brother was.

Good humor and laughter are far too wonderful not to come straight from the heart of God.

A sense of humor is helpful for those who would advance social change.

Living at risk is jumping off the cliff and building your wings on the way down.

I was walking down the street with my friend and he said ‘I hear music,’ as though there’s any other way to take it in. ‘You’re not special. That’s how I receive it too, I tried to taste it, but it did not work’.

For me, suspense doesn’t have any value if it’s not balanced by humor.

Pepperidge Farm bread. That’s fancy bread. You can tell it’s fancy because it’s wrapped twice. You open it, and it still isn’t open. That’s why I don’t buy it. I don’t need another step between me and toast.

Sometimes I get really lonely. Especially when I’m throwing a Frisbee.

When it comes to racism, you hear people say, “I don’t care if people are white, black, purple or green.” Hold on, now, purple or green? Come on now, you gotta draw the line somewhere.