The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it’s their fault.
Henry KissingerHenry Kissinger My fans are so funny, they make me laugh so much. I’ve got some really, really, funny, clever fans.
Ellie GouldingEllie Goulding Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
Erma BombeckErma Bombeck Books are funny little portable pieces of thought.
Susan SontagSusan Sontag You know you’re getting old when work is a lot less fun and fun is a lot more work.
Joan RiversJoan Rivers If a mute kid swears, should his mother wash his hands with soap?
Steven WrightSteven Wright I got a waterbed, but my husband stocked it with trout.
Joan RiversJoan Rivers I could never be a woman, ’cause I’d just stay home and play with my breasts all day.
Steve MartinSteve Martin Funny thing about the mind, It can trap and free you at the same time.
Sonya TeclaiSonya Teclai I’ve never been more nervous in my life than singing the national anthem at the Super Bowl.
Kelly ClarksonKelly Clarkson Life is a journey through the sea between the Islands of birth and success.
AurthurAurthur There are times when god speaks. You might not hear the words, but you’ll see. You’ll see.
Sonya TeclaiSonya Teclai For in the wild I feel the safest where the thorns of the invisible hand can not prick me.
Raha ArazRaha Araz I tried to write you something uplifting but I could only see grey.
Carmen AmadosCarmen Amados I want to spend the rest of my coffee’s with you.
Jessica PickardJessica Pickard Never again will I give, give myself to those who refuse to see my fire.
TMCTMC
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