A lot of writers come from Harvard and such, and are rich, and they write under the misapprehension that poor people are stupid. So when they do write them, they are hillbillies or rednecks or Christian idiots.
NORM MACDONALDIt is often better to be restricted to necessity than unconfined in the measure of our desires: prosperity destroys more individuals than adversity ruins.
More Norm MacDonald Quotes
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When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that’s a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.
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I’m thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.
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Scientists believe they may have discovered a primitive form of life on Jupiter’s moon Europa. That primitive form of life? You guessed it, Frank Stallone.
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They that are fated to be fools, have one consolation, that they are fated also to be ignorant of it.
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I want you to buy this pit bull. This will protect your valuables.’ I don’t own anything very valuable. If I buy the pit bull, that would be the most valuable thing I own. I’d have to buy something to protect it then.
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Reason is always weak where prejudice is strong.
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Some people are so much afraid of being deceived, that they never venture to trust; like misers, their avarice destroys their gain.
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There are two things at which most men are grieved: when their faults are exposed, and when their virtues are concealed.
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Comedy is surprises, so if you’re intending to make somebody laugh and they don’t laugh, that’s funny.
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In math, you could get 100 percent. It was very fair. That’s what I liked about math. You could figure it out, and the teacher couldn’t have a stupid opinion about it.
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Imprudent restrictions often force youth farther than enticement would carry them; and careless limitation is frequently worse than no injunction.
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Though you may be last to discover your follies, be always first to correct them.
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Hypocrisy is the outward acknowledgment of inward shame.
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Few people love with the violence they hate.
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It is necessary to be tolerant, in order to be tolerated.
NORM MACDONALD






