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Everything comes to him who waits, except a loaned book.

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Book Come Everything Except Funny Loaned Sarcastic Wait

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Marilyn Monroe Paulo Coelho Abraham Lincoln C. S. Lewis Khalil Gibran Charlie Chaplin Gautama Buddha Isaac Newton

If you haven’t seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven’t seen her smile her prettiest.
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Cup Funny Marriage Prettiest Smile Traffic Wife
Nothing’s as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas.
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Children Christmas Little Mean Nothing Something Useful
Live so that you can at least get the benefit of the doubt.
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Behavior Benefit Can Doubt Live
If the government was as afraid of disturbing the consumer as it is of disturbing business, this would be some democracy.
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Business Consumer Democracy Disturb Government Some
There are two ways to handle a woman, and nobody knows either of them.
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Either Handle Know Them Way Woman
The election is not very far off when a candidate can recognize you across the street.
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Across Candidate Election Recognize Street
University: … a place where rich men send their sons who have no aptitude for business.
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Aptitude Business Place Rich Send Son University
Boys will be boys, and so will a lot of middle-aged men.
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Aged Boy Humorous Maturity Men Willmiddle
If there’s anything mean in a feller, a litter authority will bring it out.
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Authority Bring Feller Mean Out
Nothing dispels enthusiasm like a small admission fee.
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Admission Dispel Enthusiasm Fee Funny Nothing Poor Small
Ther’s still a few honest folks left but they never seem t’ find anything you lose.
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Anything Few Folk Honest Lose never Seem Still
A good listener is usually thinking about something else.
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Else Sarcasm Sarcastic Something Think
Some folks seem to have descended from the chimpanzee much later than others.
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Chimpanzee Descend Folk Later Other Seem Some
Nobody kicks on being interrupted if it’s by applause.
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Applause Being Interrupted Kick Nobody
Never tell the box-office man that you can’t hear well or he will sell you a seat where you can’t see either.
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Box Either Hear never Office Seat Sell Tell
Don’t a fellow feel good after he gets out of a store where he nearly bought something.
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Feel Get Good Nearly Something Store

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