Sex at age 90 is like trying to shoot pool with a rope.
GEORGE BURNSIf you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.
More George Burns Quotes
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How can I die? I’m booked.
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I honestly think it is better to be a failure at something you love than to be a success at something you hate.
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Nice to be here? At my age it’s nice to be anywhere.
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The most important thing in acting is honesty. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.
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I don’t believe in dying. It’s been done. I’m working on a new exit. Besides, I can’t die now – I’m booked.
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If you live to be one hundred, you’ve got it made. Very few people die past that age.
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At my age flowers scare me.
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Be quick to learn and wise to know.
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It’s hard for me to get used to these changing times. I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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I can remember when the air was clean and sex was dirty.
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It takes only one drink to get me drunk. The trouble is, I can’t remember if it’s the thirteenth or the fourteenth.
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I’m at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.
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Too bad that all the people who know how to run the country are busy driving taxicabs and cutting hair.
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I’d rather be a failure at something I love than a success at something I hate.
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You can’t help getting older, but you don’t have to get old.
GEORGE BURNS