Housework can kill you if done right.
ERMA BOMBECKOne never realizes how different a husband and wife can be until they begin to pack for a trip.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
-
-
Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
ERMA BOMBECK -
I’ve exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Pregnancy is the only time in a woman’s life she can help God work a miracle.
ERMA BOMBECK -
When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’.
ERMA BOMBECK -
When humor goes, there goes civilization.
ERMA BOMBECK -
When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
ERMA BOMBECK -
If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
ERMA BOMBECK -
There’s nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child.
ERMA BOMBECK -
There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
ERMA BOMBECK -
Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
ERMA BOMBECK -
My theory on housework is, if the item doesn’t multiply, smell, catch fire, or block the refrigerator door, let it be. No one else cares. Why should you?
ERMA BOMBECK -
It is my theory you can’t get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.
ERMA BOMBECK -
A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. “What shall we name the other one?” I smiled. She was not amused.
ERMA BOMBECK -
I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.
ERMA BOMBECK -
If a man watches three football games in a row, he should be declared legally dead.
ERMA BOMBECK