Success is outliving your failures.
ERMA BOMBECKLaughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.
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My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car.
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Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It’s unbridled, its unplanned, it’s full of suprises.
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The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
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Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn’t turn it on.
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It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.
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No one ever died from sleeping in an unmade bed.
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Encourage independence in your children by regularly losing them in the supermarket.
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Don’t confuse fame with success. Madonna is one; Helen Keller is the other.
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If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
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Seize the moment. Remember all those women on the ‘Titanic’ who waved off the dessert cart.
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Maybe age is kinder to us than we think. With my bad eyes, I can’t see how bad I look, and with my rotten memory, I have a good excuse for getting out of a lot of stuff.
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Housework can kill you if done right.
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I never leaf through a copy of National Geographic without realizing how lucky we are to live in a society where it is traditional to wear clothes.
ERMA BOMBECK