Friends are “annuals” that need seasonal nurturing to bear blossoms. Family is a “perennial” that comes up year after year, enduring the droughts of absence and neglect. There’s a place in the garden for both of them.
ERMA BOMBECKA grandparent will help you with your buttons, your zippers, and your shoelaces and not be in any hurry for you to grow up.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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Cleanliness is not next to godliness. It isn’t even in the same neighborhood. No one has ever gotten a religious experience out of removing burned-on cheese from the grill of the toaster oven.
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There’s something wrong with a mother who washes out a measuring cup with soap and water after she’s only measured water in it.
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I just clipped 2 articles from a current magazine. One is a diet guaranteed to drop 5 pounds off my body in a weekend. The other is a recipe for a 6 minute pecan pie.
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Like religion, politics, and family planning, cereal is not a topic to be brought up in public. It’s too controversial.
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It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
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Once you see the drivers in Indonesia you understand why religion plays such a part in their lives.
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Pregnancy is the only time in a woman’s life she can help God work a miracle.
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Laughter rises out of tragedy when you need it the most, and rewards you for your courage.
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When my kids become wild and unruly, I use a nice, safe playpen. When they’re finished, I climb out.
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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Housework can kill you if done right.
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How come anything you buy will go on sale next week?
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There is a thin line that separates laughter and pain, comedy and tragedy, humor and hurt.
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He who laughs lasts.
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It is ludicrous to read the microwave direction on the boxes of food you buy, as each one will have a disclaimer: THIS WILL VARY WITH YOUR MICROWAVE. Loosely translated, this means, You’re on your own, Bernice.
ERMA BOMBECK