The hippopotamus is a vegetarian and looks like a wall. Lions who eat only red meat are sleek and slim. Are nutritionists on the wrong track?
ERMA BOMBECKIt is my theory you can’t get rid of fat. All you can do is move it around, like furniture.
More Erma Bombeck Quotes
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It seemed rather incongruous that in a society of super sophisticated communication, we often suffer from a shortage of listeners.
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I remember thinking how often we look, but never see … we listen, but never hear … we exist, but never feel. We take our relationships for granted. A house is only a place. It has no life of its own. It needs human voices, activity and laughter to come alive.
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Have you any idea how many children it takes to turn off one light in the kitchen Three. It takes one to say What light and two more to say I didn’t turn it on.
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It takes a lot of courage to show your dreams to someone else.
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Never have more children than you have car windows.
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Grandparenthood is one of life’s rewards for surviving your own children.
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I am not a glutton – I am an explorer of food.
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Some emotions don’t make a lot of noise. It’s hard to hear pride. Caring is real faint – like a heartbeat. And pure love – why, some days it’s so quiet, you don’t even know it’s there.
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Cats invented self-esteem.
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For years, my husband and I have advocated separate vacations. But the kids keep finding us.
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A grandmother pretends she doesn’t know who you are on Halloween.
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Humor is a spontaneous, wonderful bit of an outburst that just comes. It’s unbridled, its unplanned, it’s full of suprises.
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If you can’t make it better, you can laugh at it.
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I just clipped 2 articles from a current magazine. One is a diet guaranteed to drop 5 pounds off my body in a weekend. The other is a recipe for a 6 minute pecan pie.
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Housework, if it is done properly, can cause brain damage.
ERMA BOMBECK