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If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

Dorothy Parker

Three be the things I shall never attain: Envy, content, and sufficient champagne.
DOROTHY PARKER

Enough Jealous Satisfaction Wine
It turns out that, at social gatherings, as a source of entertainment, conviviality, and good fun, I rank somewhere between a sprig of parsley and a single ice-skate.
DOROTHY PARKER

Entertainment Fun Goodness Myself
The cleverest woman on earth is the biggest fool on earth with a man.
DOROTHY PARKER

Big Earth Fools Love Man Woman
I’d like to have money. And I’d like to be a good writer. These two can come together, and I hope they will, but if that’s too adorable, I’d rather have money.
DOROTHY PARKER

Goodness Money Myself Togetherness Writing
Most good women are hidden treasures who are only safe because nobody looks for them.
DOROTHY PARKER

Goodness Hide Safety Treasure Woman
Writing well is the best revenge.
DOROTHY PARKER

One Liner Revenge Writing
Men seldom make passes at girls who wear glasses.
DOROTHY PARKER

Appearance Girl Man Wear
Take me or leave me; or, as is the usual order of things, both.
DOROTHY PARKER

Acceptance Leaving Myself
The definition of eternity is two people and a ham.
DOROTHY PARKER

Food Forever People
His voice was as intimate as the rustle of sheets.
DOROTHY PARKER

Bed Himself Voice
That would be a good thing for them to cut on my tombstone: Wherever she went, including here, it was against her better judgment.
DOROTHY PARKER

Better Death Goodness Herself Judgement
All I need is room enough to lay a hat and a few friends.
DOROTHY PARKER

Enough Friendship Need Room
All I say is, nobody has any business to go around looking like a horse and behaving as if it were all right. You don’t catch horses going around looking like people, do you?
DOROTHY PARKER

Animal Business People Right Yourself
By the time you swear you’re his, Shivering and sighing. And he vows his passion is, Infinite, undying. Lady make note of this — One of you is lying.
DOROTHY PARKER

Death Lying Marriage Passion Promise Time Yourself
I know this will come as a shock to you, Mr. Goldwyn, but in all history, which has held billions and billions of human beings, not a single one ever had a happy ending.
DOROTHY PARKER

End Happiness History Human Willing
The best way to keep children at home is to make the home atmosphere pleasant, and let the air out of the tires.
DOROTHY PARKER

Atmosphere Best Children Home

If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

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If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me.

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Popular Authors

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