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If you’re so smart, let’s see you get out of the Army.

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Good pitching will always stop good hitting and vice-versa.
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Always Atop Good Hit Pitch Versa Vice
Being with a woman all night never hurt no professional baseball player. It’s staying up all night looking for a woman that does him in.
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Baseball Hurt Look Night Player Professional Stay Woman
I came in here and a fella asked me to have a drink. I said I don’t drink. Then another fella said hear you and Joe DiMaggio aren’t speaking and I said I’ll take that drink.
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Sure I played, did you think I was born at the age of 70 sitting in a dugout trying to manage guys like you?
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I got players with bad watches – they can’t tell midnight from noon.
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All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.
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The Yankees don’t pay me to win every day, just two out of three.
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The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for… reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration.
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I don’t know if he throws a spitball but he sure spits on the ball.
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You can’t go out to the mound hobbling and take a pitcher out with a cane.
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All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how much you blame him, it will not change you.
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Another Blame Change Fault How Matter Much Regardless Time Waste
The trouble is not that players have sex the night before a game. It’s that they stay out all night looking for it.
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Everybody line up alphabetically according to your height.
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The key to being a good manager is keeping the people who hate me away from those who are still undecided.
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I was such a dangerous hitter I even got intentional walks during batting practice.
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You have to have a catcher because if you don’t you’re likely to have a lot of passed balls.
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