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I’ve always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It’s an island and the audience can’t run very far.

Bob Hope

It’s not hard to find Gerry Ford on a golf course – you just follow the wounded.
BOB HOPE

Course Golf Wounded
The Governor has no presidential aspirations. In fact he just made a tour of 43 states just to tell them he’s not running for anything.
BOB HOPE

Aspiration Funny Presidential Running States
One of our stock lines used to be “There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for Bing, and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me.” And that’s the way we go through life – doing nothing for each other!
BOB HOPE

Each Lines Nothing Other Stock Way
By the 9th hole they were engaged and when they finished on 18 they had a foursome.
BOB HOPE

Eighteen Engaged Finished Foursome
I’d give up golf if I didn’t have so many sweaters.
BOB HOPE

Giving Golf Sweaters Up
If you watch a game, it’s fun. If you play it, it’s recreation. If you work at it, it’s golf.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hope Inspirational Sports
The best thing about growing older is that it takes such a long time.
BOB HOPE

Age Growing Long
And on nearby islands, the Japanese army was eating raw fish. We felt sorry for them.
BOB HOPE

Country Funny People Sorry War
You could buy my book in a paperback edition for a dollar, and in hard covers for $3.50. And for fifty cents extra.
BOB HOPE

Book Funny Reading
Not that they were that anxious to see Ronnie as President; they were afraid if he didn’t get elected, he’d go back to acting.
BOB HOPE

Acting Funny President
It was a typically British birth… I was three at the time. They had a strike in the maternity ward… I came out in sympathy.
BOB HOPE

Funny Hilarious Sympathy Witty
Bing Crosby and I weren’t the types to go around kissing each other. We always had a light jab for each other.
BOB HOPE

Doing Nothing Kissing Light
Congratulations to whoever is finally booking music we love. It’s going to get us out of the house after dark!
BOB HOPE

Congratulations Dark House
Golf is a funny game. It’s done much for health, and at the same time has ruined people by robbing them of their peace of mind. Look at me, I’m the healthiest idiot in the world.
BOB HOPE

Games Golf Hope Look People Ruin
I was there. I saw your sons and your husbands, your brothers and your sweethearts. I saw how they worked, played, fought, and lived. I saw some of them die.
BOB HOPE

Brother Country Day Die Husband Veterans
A photographer kept shooting me every time I swung. I was very flattered until I found out he was from Field and Stream.
BOB HOPE

Fields Flatterers Golf Shooting

I’ve always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It’s an island and the audience can’t run very far.

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I’ve always felt England was a great place for a comic to work. It’s an island and the audience can’t run very far.

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Popular Authors

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