When life gets you down, make a comforter!
BO BURNHAMIf I had a dime for every time a homeless guy asked me for change, I’d still say no.
More Bo Burnham Quotes
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The classic comedian says there’s nothing that’s taboo; if you laugh at one thing you’ve got to laugh at everything, that comedy is taking people to dark areas and showing them the light.
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The thing is, I was on YouTube like the golden era, I think. Before ads came in, it was really cool back then.
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Women are like fingers and toes because they’re easy to count on.
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What’s a pirate minus the ship? just a creative homeless guy
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I’m happy with what I’m doing. I try not to focus on how I’ve changed. I just try to focus on what I’m doing now.
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Postmodern comedy doesn’t work well with very old audiences, because it’s making fun of the comedy they enjoy.
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Women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote. Puzzles still don’t.
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I know it’s the comedian’s instinct to say, “Do it, man, nothing’s off-limits! It’s cool, bro!” I don’t know if that’s the answer for me.
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For some comedians it feels so cool to be like: ‘I’ll say anything, man!’. I’m not quite there yet.
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I’m friends with a lot of comedians, but we don’t talk about material. Most comedians I know don’t watch a lot of other comedy.
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If Jesus can walk on water, can he swim on land?
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I’m gay for Jesus, fill me with your grace. Pour your love all over me, but please aim away from my face.
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There’s a metal train that a mile long and at the very back end a lightning bolt struck her. How long til it reaches and kills the driver, provided that he’s a good conductor?
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I met a bipolar bear. He laughed, cried, then wanted a threesome.
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I don’t need anything as long as I have my family, friends, millions of dollars, unlimited pussy.
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