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I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

Bill Watterson

Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement.
BILL WATTERSON

Creating Good Life Thinking
You’ve taught me nothing except how to cynically manipulate the system. Congratulations.
BILL WATTERSON

Congratulation Cynically Expect Manipulate Nothing Taught
A day can really slip by when you’re deliberately avoiding what you’re supposed to do.
BILL WATTERSON

Avoiding Hobbies Slips
Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
BILL WATTERSON

Country Kings Mom Nice People Think
My problem is that I don’t paint ambitiously. It’s all catch and release – just tiny fish that aren’t really worth the trouble to clean and cook.
BILL WATTERSON

Problem Tiny Trouble
It’s hard to be religious when certain people are never incinerated by bolts of lightning.
BILL WATTERSON

Incinerated People Religious
Rainy days should be spent at home with a cup of tea and a good book.
BILL WATTERSON

Book Rain Reading
I’m learning real skills that I can apply throughout the rest of my life…procrastinating and rationalizing.
BILL WATTERSON

Country Friendship People Rationalizing Real Skills
Animals aren’t conditional about friendships. Animals like you just the way you are. They listen to your problems, they comfort you when you’re sad, and all they ask in return is a little kindness.
BILL WATTERSON

Animal Ask Friendship Kindness Problem
I don’t enjoy lettering very much, but that’s the way I write and that belongs in the strip because the strip is a reflection of me.
BILL WATTERSON

Lettering Reflection Way Writing
I tell you all this because it’s worth recognizing that there is no such thing as an overnight success.
BILL WATTERSON

Detours Ideas Recognizing Success Trying
I’ve always tried to make the strip animated, even when the characters aren’t moving, with expressions or perspectives or some sort of exaggeration.
BILL WATTERSON

Aggerations Character Expression Moving
[Calvin and Hobbes are playing Scrabble] Calvin: Ha! I’ve got a great word and it’s on a “Double word score” box! Hobbes: “ZQFMGB” isn’t a word! It doesn’t even have a vowel! Calvin: It is so a word! It’s a worm found in New Guinea!
BILL WATTERSON

Looks Scrabble Vowels
Hey Susie Derkins, is that your face, or is a ‘possum stuck in your collar?
BILL WATTERSON

Faces People Possums
You know, maybe we don’t need enemies.” “Yeah, best friends aree about all I can take.
BILL WATTERSON

Enemy Maybe Needs Take Yeah
Hobbes: How come we play war and not peace? Calvin: Too few role models.
BILL WATTERSON

Peace Play War
One of the jokes I really like is that the fantasies are drawn more realistically than reality, since that says a lot about what’s going on in Calvin’s head.
BILL WATTERSON

Fantasies Head Realistically Since
Raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak… Am I scary, or what?
BILL WATTERSON

Avenue Cynical Hollywood Poised Raised Scary
You know, there are times when it’s a source of personal pride to not be human.
BILL WATTERSON

Humans Pride Source
The whole idea of hobknobbing and schmoozing and the concept of an “elite” class of celebrities better than the common people has always made my stomach turn.
BILL WATTERSON

Celebrities Class Common Ideas People
Even when you look for it, you’re never prepared for it.
BILL WATTERSON

Looks never Prepared
Every artist learns through imitation, but I rather doubt the aim of these things is artistic development.
BILL WATTERSON

Artist Doubt Taken Talking
If you give a little credit to the concept of the artist, I think you ought to indulge excesses a bit, because that reflects the personality of the writer.
BILL WATTERSON

Artist Jobs Thinking
Calvin: Isn’t it strange that evolution would give us a sense of humor? When you think about it, it’s weird that we have a physiological response to absurdity.
BILL WATTERSON

Appreciating Giving Thinking
As you can see, I have memorized this utterly useless piece of information long enough to pass a test question. I now intend to forget it forever.
BILL WATTERSON

Congratulations Forever Long
I like my smock. You can tell the quality of the artist by the quality of his smock. Actually, I just like to say smock. Smock smock smock smock smock smock.
BILL WATTERSON

Actually Artist Quality Smoke Tell
Barney’s Dad was really bad so Barney hatched a plan when his dad said “Eat your peas.” Barney shouted no and ran Barney tricked his mean old dad and locked him in the cellar Barney’s Mom never found out where he’d gone, Cause Barney didn’t tell her. T
BILL WATTERSON

Dad Mom Peas Plan Sorry

I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

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I like maxims that don’t encourage behavior modification.

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