“So, what’s it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don’t recommend it.”

The way Calvin’s brain is wired, you can almost hear the fuses blowing.

I don’t enjoy lettering very much, but that’s the way I write and that belongs in the strip because the strip is a reflection of me.

Ah, the life of a newspaper cartoonist – how I miss the groupies, drugs and trashed hotel rooms!

Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.

To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.

Years from now, when I’m successful and happy, …and he’s in prison… I hope I’m not too mature to gloat.

Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.

Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.

As “Calvin and Hobbes” went on, the writing pushed the drawings into greater complexity.

Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.

I’ve been amazed at how one idea leads to others if I allow my mind to play and wander.

If you give a little credit to the concept of the artist, I think you ought to indulge excesses a bit, because that reflects the personality of the writer.

No sport is less organized than Calvinball.

What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!

I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh track.

Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.

Well we’re waiting here in Allentown For the Pennsylvania we never found For the promises our teachers gave If we worked hard If we behaved So the graduations hang on the wall But they never really helped us at all No they never taught us what was real.

God wants us to know that life is a series of beginnings not endings. Just as graduations are not terminations but commencements. Creation is an ongoing process and when we create a perfect world where love and compassion are shared by all suffering will cease.

When I was here there was still a requirement that students had to swim 50 yards to graduate…because Harry Elkins Widener had drowned with the sinking of the Titanic. And it made me very grateful at the time that he had not gone down in a plane crash.

If your uniform isn’t dirty, you haven’t been in the game.

Respect people with less power then you. I don’t care if you’re the most powerful cat in the room,

But youth has a future. The closer he came to graduation, the more his heart beat. He said to himself: “This is still not life, this is only the preparation for life.

But the Princeton fellowship was somewhat more generous, since I had not actually won the Putnam competition… Thus Princeton became the choice for my graduate study location.

The American high school graduate is two years behind his English, French or German counterpart; in Alabama, God knows how far behind.