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I think of football as a sport the way ducks think of hunting as a sport.

Bill Watterson

The real fun of living wisely is that you get to be smug about it.
BILL WATTERSON

Fun Real Smug Wisely
Calvin:”It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’…what do you suppose that means?” Television: “…it means that Karl Marx hadn’t seen anything yet
BILL WATTERSON

Mean Opiates Television
Sometimes I think the surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
BILL WATTERSON

Contact None Sometimes Think Universe
In the short term, it would make me happy to go play outside. In the long term, it would make me happier to do well at school and become successful. But in the VERY long term, I know which will make better memories.
BILL WATTERSON

Long Memories Outside School Successful Term
At that time, we turn around and say, yes, this is obviously where I was going all along. It’s a good idea to try to enjoy the scenery on the detours, because you’ll probably take a few.
BILL WATTERSON

Along Around Detroit Enjoy Good Probably Time
I was reading about how countless species are being pushed toward extinction by man’s destruction of forests. . . .
BILL WATTERSON

Forest Intelligent Reading Thinking
Calvin: The more you know, the harder it is to take decisive action. Once you are informed, you start seeing complexities and shades of gray.
BILL WATTERSON

Ignorant Men Risk
Raised to an alarming extent by Madison Avenue and Hollywood, poised with my cynical and alienated peers to take over the world when you’re old and weak… Am I scary, or what?
BILL WATTERSON

Avenue Cynical Hollywood Poised Raised Scary
It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what’s cool.
BILL WATTERSON

Grow Up Ideas People
For me, it’s been liberating to put myself in the mind of a fictitious six year-old each day, and rediscover my own curiosity.
BILL WATTERSON

Curiosity Ideas Play Years
I keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.
BILL WATTERSON

Littles Nice People
If your knees aren’t green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.
BILL WATTERSON

Examine Fun Garden Life
I try to make everyone’s day a little more surreal.
BILL WATTERSON

Little Surreal Trying
Calvin: Today for show and tell, I’ve brought a tiny miracle of nature: a single snowflake!
BILL WATTERSON

Learning Snowflake Thinking Unique
It’s a cruel season that makes you get ready for bed while it’s light out.
BILL WATTERSON

Light Sleep Summer
That’s one of the remarkable things about life. It’s never so bad that it can’t get worse.
BILL WATTERSON

Bad Perseverance Remarkable Worse
A box of new crayons! Now they’re all pointy, lined up in order, bright and perfect. Soon they’ll be a bunch of ground down, rounded, indistinguishable stumps, missing their wrappers and smudged with other colors. Sometimes life seems unbearably tragic.
BILL WATTERSON

Color Crayon Order Perfect Pointy
All the new media will inevitably change the look, function, and maybe even the purpose of comics, but comics are vibrant and versatile, so I think they’ll continue to find relevance one way or another. But they definitely won’t be the same as what I grew up with.
BILL WATTERSON

Looks Media Thinking
I’d hate to have a kid like me.
BILL WATTERSON

Hate Kids Like
It’s going to be a grim day when the world is run by a generation that doesn’t know anything but what it’s seen on TV.
BILL WATTERSON

Generation Running World
Calvin: Dad where do babies come from? Dad: Well Calvin, you simply go to Sears, buy the kit and follow the assembly instructions. Calvin: I came from Sears? Dad: No you were a blue-light special at K-Mart – almost as good and a lot cheaper!
BILL WATTERSON

Assembly Baby Cheaper Dad Light Sears
In the right hands, a comic strip attains a beauty and elegance that, really, I would put against any other art.
BILL WATTERSON

Art Book Comics Hands
I like my smock. You can tell the quality of the artist by the quality of his smock. Actually, I just like to say smock. Smock smock smock smock smock smock.
BILL WATTERSON

Actually Artist Quality Smoke Tell
At school, new ideas are thrust at you every day. Out in the world, you’ll have to find your inner motivation to seek for new ideas on your own.
BILL WATTERSON

Day Every Ideas Motivation New School
Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.
BILL WATTERSON

Essence Surprise Surprising
Life is like topography, Hobbes. There are summits of happiness and success, flat stretches of boring routine and valleys of frustration and failure.
BILL WATTERSON

Frustration Life Like Running
When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.
BILL WATTERSON

Bird Bugs Taste

I think of football as a sport the way ducks think of hunting as a sport.

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I think of football as a sport the way ducks think of hunting as a sport.

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