“It seems like once people grow up, they have no idea what’s cool.”

Life’s disappointments are harder to take when you don’t know any swear words.

To invent your own life’s meaning is not easy, but it’s still allowed, and I think you’ll be happier for the trouble.

Years from now, when I’m successful and happy, …and he’s in prison… I hope I’m not too mature to gloat.

So, what’s it like in the real world? Well, the food is better, but beyond that, I don’t recommend it.

Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.

Surprise is the essence of humor, and nothing is more surprising than truth.

As “Calvin and Hobbes” went on, the writing pushed the drawings into greater complexity.

Maybe that’s why it’s hard to tell if we’re living in a tragedy or a farce. Calvin: We need more special effects and dance numbers.

I’ve been amazed at how one idea leads to others if I allow my mind to play and wander.

If you give a little credit to the concept of the artist, I think you ought to indulge excesses a bit, because that reflects the personality of the writer.

No sport is less organized than Calvinball.

What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!

I thought my life would seem more interesting with a musical score and a laugh track.

Ms. Wormwood: See me after class, Calvin. Calvin: [retrospectively] I’m not dumb. I just have a command of thoroughly useless information.

I’ve always tried to make the strip animated, even when the characters aren’t moving, with expressions or perspectives or some sort of exaggeration.

I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?

Growing up with a house full of women and seeing them look good no matter what they put on every morning just inspired me to look good myself.

Not a lot of people see that when you’re growing up. You don’t get to see that people really have to work hard to become as good as they are.

There’s something different about growing up black and Muslim, especially in New Jersey. It’s like when I left the mosque and I left my dad, I felt unprotected, but I also felt a weird sense of pride, like I was involved in this other way of living that was cool to me.

I was’nt always black. There was this freckel that just grew and grew.

What do you want to be when you grow up? As if growing up is finite. As if at some point you become something and that’s the end.

One of the lessons that I grew up with was to always stay true to yourself and never let what somebody else says distract you from your goals. And so when I hear about negative and false attacks, I really don’t invest any energy in them, because I know who I am.

Youth is a circumstance you can’t do anything about. The trick is to grow up without getting old.

I grew up with a disabled dad in a too-small house with not much money in a starting-to-fail neighborhood, and I also grew up surrounded by love and music in a diverse city in a country where an education can take you far. I had nothing or I had everything. It depends on which way you want to tell it.