When birds burp, it must taste like bugs.
BILL WATTERSONI keep forgetting that rules are only for little nice people.
More Bill Watterson Quotes
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At that time, we turn around and say, yes, this is obviously where I was going all along. It’s a good idea to try to enjoy the scenery on the detours, because you’ll probably take a few.
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Know what’s weird? Day by day, nothing seems to change. But pretty soon, everything’s different.
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I let my mind wander and it didn’t come back.
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Good friends are hard to come by… I need more money.
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Suddenly, we realize our time in here is fleeting. Is our quick experience here pointless?
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What’s the point of wearing your favorite rocket ship underpants if nobody ever asks to see ’em?
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I don’t know how to spell it and I’m not allowed to say it. Could you just rattle off all the swear words you know and I’ll stop you when…Hello?
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Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!
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Now if a joke is in bad taste or it’s not funny, okay, that’s awhole different thing, but how you craft a joke is really what the writer’s job is, and I don’t think that technique should be subject to any editorial constraints.
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You mix a bunch of ingredients, and once in a great while, chemistry happens.
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Creating a life that reflects your values and satisfies your soul is a rare achievement.
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I hope some historian will confirm that I was the first cartoonist to use the word ‘booger’ in a newspaper comic strip.
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I’M SIGNIFICANT!!! … Say’s the dust speck.
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In a culture that relentlessly promotes avarice and excess as the good life, a person happy doing his own work is usually considered an eccentric, if not a subversive.
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Ms. Wormwood: Calvin, can you tell us what Lewis and Clark did? Calvin: No, but I can recite the secret superhero origin of each member of Captain Napalm’s Thermonuclear League of Liberty.
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We don’t devote enough scientific research to finding a cure for jerks.
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The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us.
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Calvin:”It says here that ‘religion is the opiate of the masses.’…what do you suppose that means?” Television: “…it means that Karl Marx hadn’t seen anything yet
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I’ve been amazed at how one idea leads to others if I allow my mind to play and wander.
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My whole problem is that my lips move when I think.
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Calvin: ME TARZAN! KING OF JUNGLE! Suzy: Nice underpants. Does your mom know you’re over here like this? Calvin:…I don’t think Jane EVER said that to Tarzan.
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You will do well to cultivate the resources in yourself that bring you happiness outside of success or failure.
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You realize nothing is as clear as it first appears. Ultimately, knowledge is paralyzing. Being a man of action, I cannot afford to take that risk. Hobbes: You’re ignorant, but at least you act on it.
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I’ve always tried to make the strip animated, even when the characters aren’t moving, with expressions or perspectives or some sort of exaggeration.
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You know, sometimes kids get bad grades in school because the class moves too slow for them. Einstein got D’s in school. Well guess what, I get F’s!!!
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What a stupid game! You must have cheated! You must have used some sneaky, underhanded mindmeld to make me lose! I hate you! I didn’t want to play this idiotic game in the first place! I knew you’d cheat!
BILL WATTERSON