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I don’t respect religon. I don’t respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.

Bill Maher

Atheism is a religion the way abstinence is a sex position.
BILL MAHER

Atheism Position Religion Sex
The Dalai Lama visited the White House and told the President that he could teach him to find a higher state of consciousness. Then after talking to Bush for a few minutes, he said, ‘You know what? Let’s just grab lunch.’
BILL MAHER

Food Home President Teaching Time Visit White Yourself
The true axis of evil in America is the brilliance of our marketing combined with the stupidity of our people.
BILL MAHER

Brilliant Ourselves People Stupidity True
To most Christians, the Bible is like a software license. Nobody actually reads it. They just scroll to the bottom and click ‘I Agree’.
BILL MAHER

Click Perspective Reading Religious Software
The thing I don’t understand about homosexuals is, how do they decide which one is the one who’s supposed to pretend they don’t want it?
BILL MAHER

Act Myself Pretend Sexuality Understand
Let’s make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake – you know, to send the right message to kids.
BILL MAHER

Children Law Message People Right Straight
The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you’ll wind up with a lover.
BILL MAHER

Friendship Ideas Lover Man Treat Woman Yourself
In the Republican party, crazy is a constituency.
BILL MAHER

Constituency Crazy Politics
Anyone who tells you that they know, they just know what happens when you die, I promise you, you dont. How can I be so sure? Because I dont know and you do not possess mental powers that I do not.
BILL MAHER

Death Myself Possession Power Promise
Like it or not, we’re still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation.
BILL MAHER

Fear Information Rule Tribe
Have you ever met a war you didn’t love? I’m asking, is there any place you don’t want to intervene in?
BILL MAHER

Love Place War Yourself
We don’t really have to make fun of religion – it makes fun of itself.
BILL MAHER

Fun Joke Religion
During the Depression, or back when we were fighting Hitler, people didn’t have time to sue a company if the coffee was too hot. There were urgent, pressing problems. If you think you have it tough, read history books.
BILL MAHER

Book Coffee Company Depression Fight History People Reading Time Tough
When I see the toothless guy, as a liberal, what I say is, ‘I want to help you get teeth.’ Why does that make me an a**hole?
BILL MAHER

Generosity Help Liberal Myself
Trusting the government to monitor your calls without listening. It’s kind of like trusting Chris Christie to pick up the McDonald’s and not eat the fries on the way home.
BILL MAHER

Call Eat Fries Government Home Listening Trust Way
Again, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don’t pay attention.
BILL MAHER

Attention Country Pay Stupidity

I don’t respect religon. I don’t respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.

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I don’t respect religon. I don’t respect superstitious thinking and that is what religous is.

Related Topics

Popular Authors

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