False hope really makes you cynical.
BILL MAHERFalse hope really makes you cynical.
BILL MAHERAgain, (America is) a stupid country with stupid people who don’t pay attention.
BILL MAHERIf Jesus was a Jew, why did he have a Spanish name?
BILL MAHERIt’s very hard not to be condescending when you’re explaining something to an idiot.
BILL MAHERIn America, you’re allowed to justify almost any kind of bigotry, sexism, or intolerance if you source it to God’s big book of bad ideas.
BILL MAHERCan we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for – looking up exes to see how fat they got?
BILL MAHEROne of the advantages of atheism is takes so little of your time.
BILL MAHERHalloween is a day when we all get to fool people into thinking we’re someone else. Or as Mitt Romney calls it, campaigning.
BILL MAHERWomen cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
BILL MAHERWe need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It’s overrun with sheep and conformists.
BILL MAHERI don’t say that I’m an atheist. I don’t like that term, because I think it mirrors the certitude of religion. I say I don’t know. And if you don’t know – and you don’t – just man up and say you don’t know. Don’t turn to silly stories and ancient myths.
BILL MAHERHot women have to stop putting long paragraphs of text on their bodies. I know you think it’s sexy but one thing that men never think is, “Gee, you know what would make this sex better? Having something to read.”
BILL MAHERDid you see the 2000 Republican Presidential Convention? The last time the Republicans had that many Black people on a stage, they were selling them!
BILL MAHERFunny that all of Nixon’s crimes – anonymous campaign cash, wiretapping, undeclared wars – are all legal now. Discuss.
BILL MAHERThe reason I love my dog so much is because when I come home, he’s the only one in the world who treats me like I’m the Beatles.
BILL MAHERThe thing I don’t understand about homosexuals is, how do they decide which one is the one who’s supposed to pretend they don’t want it?
BILL MAHER