We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels and free thinkers. It’s overrun with sheep and conformists.
BILL MAHERTo those people who say, ‘My father is alive because of animal experimentation,’ I say, ‘Yeah, well, good for you. This dog died so your father could live.’ Sorry, but I am just not behind that kind of trade-off.
More Bill Maher Quotes
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The church has historically been very slow to embrace technology. Until very recently, their idea of a laptop was an altar boy.
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In this country your guilty until proven wealthy.
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A new cologne is coming out. It’s for cowboys, and it’s made from cow’s manure. That way the women will be on you like flies!
BILL MAHER -
If anti-gay stuff is always coming out of your mouth, something very gay is probably going in.
BILL MAHER -
The idea that men are from Mars and women are from Venus is a bunch of bullshit. Treat her like you would a friend, and you’ll wind up with a lover.
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The Drug War is an addiction, really.
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Like it or not, we’re still a primitive tribe ruled by fears, superstition and misinformation.
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Based on every statement I’ve heard out of any Republican in the last two years, the Israelis are controlling our government.
BILL MAHER -
You can’t pray away global warming, and that’s the difference between religious people and sane people.
BILL MAHER -
Who takes care of their people better? FEMA or Hezbollah?
BILL MAHER -
You know, there is a name for people who are always wrong about everything all the time, husband!!!
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Let’s face it; God has a big ego problem. Why do we always have to worship him?
BILL MAHER -
God knows life sucks. It’s right there in the Bible. The book of Job is all about Job asking God to take away pain and misery. And God says, “I can’t take away pain and misery because then no one would talk to me.”
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Maybe a president who didn’t believe our soldiers were going to heaven might be a little less willing to get them killed.
BILL MAHER -
Let’s make a law that gay people can have birthdays, but straight people get more cake – you know, to send the right message to kids.
BILL MAHER