I feel sorry for James Blunt, he has to wake up every morning and think ‘Oh my God, I’m James Blunt, what have I done?’
BILL BAILEYPeople say ‘Bill, are you an optimist?’ And I say, ‘I hope so.’
More Bill Bailey Quotes
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I am a confectionery-based existentialist.
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Contentment is knowing you’re right
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Not to be confused with the Ukrainian hunting spider, which actually has got a limp and is, as such, completely harmless, and a little bit bitter about the whole thing.
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So many beautiful things, I cannot possess them all!
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What I’d like to do now – well, what I’d like to do now is grow my beard very long, weave it into my pubes and strum it like a harp.
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American rock has a sort of self-pitying whine to it.
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Or, as I call it, a Cheesel, it’s a Weasel with a Cheese finish.
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This shed does not contain me.
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There’s more evil in the charts than an Al-Qaeda suggestion box.
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I try to appreciate the simple things. I’ve just been camping with my son and I enjoyed that just as much if not more than a holiday in a posh hotel. I like making a cup of tea and bacon sarnie in the morning.
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People say ‘Bill, are you an optimist?’ And I say, ‘I hope so.’
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I tried to like it. For me, it was like being smacked around the head by a piece of IKEA furniture: it hurts, but you’ve got to admire the workmanship.
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The BBC did a survey of the top 50 things to do before we die. Not while we’re still alive, before we die.
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Orchestras have often been used to conjure up the natural world: Swans, sharks, trout, but not, as far as I know, the often maligned jellyfish.
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It’s not a beard, it’s an animal I’ve trained to sit very still.
BILL BAILEY